THEY CAN lay me off, but they’ll have to drag me out. I barricade myself behind the circle of file cabinets muscled into the center of the office, topple water coolers to moat the lobby, squeeze super glue into the door locks, stack desks in front of the elevator, jimmy the vending machines for food and drink. Hunkered down in my bivouac with an arsenal of letter openers, rubber bands, I reload the staplers and wait.
I BRING Copernicus to the vet's office and this guy is standing there, his thumb swathed in bandages. Maybe his dog bit him? The doctor comes out carrying a large cage that contains a beautiful macaw, its belly wrapped in gauze and tape. He hands the man the cage then reaches into his lab coat, brings out a small box. He offers it to the bandaged man. 'Some of it was already digested, but here's what we could save.'
I like these a lot. Here's my story:
ReplyDeleteElsa swerved in the air, trying to avoid the dancing orange fire that was chasing her. The cat was being playful. Elsa wasn’t. The cat nipped at her wing. Elsa barley got away. To make things worse, it started to rain. Elsa slowed down. Her wings were tiering. The cat lunged, making Elsa swerve like a out of control plane, trying to make a crash landing. Elsa had a huge hole in her wing. Suddenly, a huge monster appeared. “Fire, come inside, your getting soaked!” Elsa went away, without a second glance.
The sun is always brighter when it’s around, The gloomiest days are always better. The time is more awesomer. My life will never be the same, my skill has increased. Planet earth changed when this “thing” was created. But what was is? That I cannot say, it’s not time, YOUR NOT READY FOR IT! So don’t get your hopes up. But more about the “thing”. It’s colourful and drenched in awesome sauce. It’s every thing imaginable, and it’s not crayola. That’s something to describe it. By the way, it’s video games, Ha!
ReplyDeleteThe machine looked evil. I didn’t know what it could do yet. The door opened behind me and I was mesmerized by its beauty. Then they grabbed me and threw me though the open door . All I remembered was them laughing their heads off and the roar of something spinning inside the machine. When I woke up everything looked so big. I walked, more like hopped, out of the machine. The people dressed in black were out there and my they were enormous. I was trying to scream but all that came out of my mouth was a,“Ribbet”.
ReplyDeleteThe office one was good. I kept picturing the stapler as a gun. It also reminded me of the movie: Home Alone when he was setting up the traps. But when I read the one with the vet, I was about to go sick. Here is another story by me.
ReplyDeleteI was flying, flying through the air it was amazing. If only I could do this all the time. Then suddenly an even mightier beast started to toy with me. I was swirling in midair. Ugh, I think I’m going to be sick. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I lost control of my wings!! Mayday! Mayday! This beast has gone mad! He was holding me by the wings! I’m going down! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! (I HATE BEING A FIGURINE!)
Here are my 2 'snippets'.
ReplyDeleteWhite Lipizzaner.
(GUESS WHO?)
'I walked into the vet’s office with my suffering pooch tucked securely under my arm. As soon as I walked in the door, I heard the ruckus that resided inside. As I explained my situation, I examined the office. Other than the obvious fact of the out-of-control volume, all systems seemed a-go in the outer room. That was my opinion until I saw the lady with her cat. My last thought before I fainted was, Why is the CAT brushing the LADY’S hair??? And why is the LADY licking her arm???'
That will take you a while to understand.
'I watched in amazement a mouse-sized baseball game unfolding before my very eyes. And their pitches were so much classier than ours. It’s not called crackerjacks there, it’s called ‘morsels to nibble on during the game’ a.k.a. M.T.N.O.D.T.G. I cheered hoarsely as I watched my favourite player run a whole feet around the bases. Then I watched the best outfielder jump an amazing leap of 1 inch into the air. What a show!'
The monster was hideous. It had long brown fangs, and a large grotesque mouth. Its face was bad. Its skin, a paper bag. It sagged creating the appearance that it was sad. But its eyes told a difference story. They are blood red, filled with rage. A look was enough to kill. Of course, it had to trashed buildings, and destroy governments. It was on a reign of terror. Everyone was afraid. But me. And for a good reason. After a good days work I looked in the mirror. And the monster stared back. Life is good. For me.
ReplyDeleteThe monster was hideous. It had long brown fangs, and a large grotesque mouth. Its face was bag. Its skin, a paper bag. It sagged creating the appearance that it was sad. But its eyes told a difference story. They are blood red, filled with rage. A look was enough to kill. Of course, it had to trashed buildings, and destroy governments. It was on a reign of terror. Everyone was afraid. But me. And for a good reason. After a good days work I looked in the mirror. And the monster stared back. Life is good. For me.
ReplyDeleteAmusing. Thanks for educative post.
ReplyDelete